Rant
All my children are giving me headaches.
Okay, not really. Just the bad ones.
I am so exhausted. D is in LA until tonight and I have been going to bed too late, so I am tired. I am sitting at my desk drinking some crappy instant cappuccino so that I will have enough caffeine in my system to make the drive home.
I'm so tired of kids acting like idiots. I told a kid to spit out his gum today and either he didn't spit it out or he got a new piece, but I had to tell him again. It was ridiculous.
The other thing I'm tired of is being lied to, and kids not taking responsibility for their actions. Bald-faced lies, day in and day out. The most common one is "I didn't do anything!" It's reflexive for some kids. It drives me insane. I can see a kid talking and the first thing out of their mouth when I call them on it is "I wasn't talking!" My usual response is "when your mouth is moving and sound is coming out, that is called talking." Just admit it and move on, damn it!!! Do they really think that claiming they didn't do anything is going to get them out of punishment?
I'm getting better at shutting kids down and not arguing with them. That's a difficult skill...you have to realize that they are not having a rational conversation with you, most of them are just trying to talk their way out of punishment.
I feel like the police too often lately. I hate that. I get the feeling that on a good day, about half my kids are actually listening to what I am saying.
The thing that drives me MOST insane is when all I see is the end of an argument between two students. Like I see one hit the other. Then the other claims that the first started it, etc...I have just started punishing both offenders because more than likely they were both involved. I hate playing referee, and I really hate the "he started it" game. And this is mostly with boys. Girls, I'm sure, are much more catty and backstabbing when they fight.
Okay, not really. Just the bad ones.
I am so exhausted. D is in LA until tonight and I have been going to bed too late, so I am tired. I am sitting at my desk drinking some crappy instant cappuccino so that I will have enough caffeine in my system to make the drive home.
I'm so tired of kids acting like idiots. I told a kid to spit out his gum today and either he didn't spit it out or he got a new piece, but I had to tell him again. It was ridiculous.
The other thing I'm tired of is being lied to, and kids not taking responsibility for their actions. Bald-faced lies, day in and day out. The most common one is "I didn't do anything!" It's reflexive for some kids. It drives me insane. I can see a kid talking and the first thing out of their mouth when I call them on it is "I wasn't talking!" My usual response is "when your mouth is moving and sound is coming out, that is called talking." Just admit it and move on, damn it!!! Do they really think that claiming they didn't do anything is going to get them out of punishment?
I'm getting better at shutting kids down and not arguing with them. That's a difficult skill...you have to realize that they are not having a rational conversation with you, most of them are just trying to talk their way out of punishment.
I feel like the police too often lately. I hate that. I get the feeling that on a good day, about half my kids are actually listening to what I am saying.
The thing that drives me MOST insane is when all I see is the end of an argument between two students. Like I see one hit the other. Then the other claims that the first started it, etc...I have just started punishing both offenders because more than likely they were both involved. I hate playing referee, and I really hate the "he started it" game. And this is mostly with boys. Girls, I'm sure, are much more catty and backstabbing when they fight.
posted by Suzy at 4:15 PM
1 Comments:
First of all, Suzanne, I understand completely.
Second, the way your kids are acting, unfortunately, is the nature of the middle school beast. Be firm, be consistent, if they start arguing back, just simply restate your initial request. As for the fighting, we rarely see it when it starts, just when it ends, or when someone gets hurt. Whomever I see doing the hitting gets in the most trouble. If the recipient of the hit has done something to the other that I saw or heard, they also get in trouble. I also ask an observer that I trust if they saw anything. If problems between the same two continue, I would either move them apart (if they're already sitting close to eachother) or ask your principal or other administrator to come and observe class, particularly those students, and give you some suggestions of how to manage that problem/those problems. The students might also have other (IEP) issues that play into things. Talk with theit other teachers and see what they (the teachers) do with the students.
I agree that "I wasn't talking" is massively annoying when you watch someone do it. I just reply, "Yes you were, I was watching you." I like your response too!
Remember that these kids are pushing boundaries. They are trying to find out what the limits are. Be firm, be consistent. It may take some time, but they (hopefully) will come around and quit arguing, once they realize it won't go anywhere with you. I still have one or two students who try to argue every little thing with me, but only a couple.
Remember what I told you at the beginning of the year, the this year is the most difficult. Next year *will* be easier (promise!). It will take a couple of years for your reputation to develop among the students. Before long, they will come in knowing what you expect.
Have you tried to ask them to show you what you expect of them? Have you tried waiting until they were silent and realized you were waiting for them?
You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. You can have a child in class or in school, but you can't make him care. Sometimes we just have to realize and recognize that we have done everything possible and the student needs to pick up the slack and do their part.
Your kids are old enough that they might just care about grades. Of course, if the parents don't care , the kids likely won't care either.
Ok, this has ended up longer that I anticipated. I'll call you tonight or tomorrow! Hang in there, babe. It's Friday!
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